Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
My 40 year old neighbors are throwing a party for their eight year old niece's birthday. It's 1am and they're still partying hard. Harder than me. It's Saturday. Just say it, I'm a disgrace to the generation.
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was trying to be really smart and save 10 dollars for each cab there and back. ...so I ripped a $20 dollar bill in half.
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
last night I learned that if you try to buy tacos in this town, that you will be stopped by three cop cars with breathalizers
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
Randomize