i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
Stole every fake plant from the lobby and placed it in front of you're apartment door, Enjoy!
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
So, when I got arrested, they fingerprinted me. I'm getting my nails done right now and I'm pretty sure he's filing off my prints. Worth the $30.
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
I forgot drug dealers have families, too. Cheers to a sober, uncomfortable, slightly enraging Thanksgiving.
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
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