is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
Ok roommate is officially weird. Just watched her microwave the same broccoli 3 times in a row and cry b/c she fucked it up. Wtf lol
Had to belly crawl across the floor to the toilet with my eyes closed to puke my life out without making my hangover worse. Three times.
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
I think you're literally the first guy to ever pick up a chick from pinterest.
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
Randomize
