Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
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we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
My vag has a bald spot. That is so middle aged. Is this my midlife crisis?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
Remember when I asked you to make sure I didn't go home with anything less than a 6 last night? You're fired
I love that you'd blow off your high school reunion to get shit faced in an aquarium with us
Um. We all know how I feel about sea life
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
is it fun? or sober?
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