Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
ttyl tear gas
Im also drinking whiskey while on a treadmill wearing high heels so let's consider that for a moment.
Eating my shrimp pasta on the porch with a 40, wearing a Hawaiian shirt, proclaiming "I GOT SCRIMPS." I just jumped the shark of college.
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
You kept running up to married couples, taking their pictures and begging for them not to get divorced
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
Randomize
