I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
She said we "made love." I had to explain to her that when both parties agree that the first time time they have sex both people agree to video tape the whole thing its not "making love" but more like random good time fun sex.
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
Did you get drunk between now and two texts ago?
If I had a dollar for every functioning brain cell you had I would owe someone a lot of money
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
Randomize
