I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
I made him a flow chart of what to do if I got arrested.
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
So I have to borrow my moms car tomorrow to go pick up my ID from the strip club so I can board my plane tomorrow
when you wake up naked in a bed with glowsticks, a rolled ankle, a hangover, and a condom; alone. you wonder shit
Randomize
