Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
Im rethinking drunk tuesdays. Also rethinking ovaries.
better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Somebody started a fire in the kitchen. I puked on it till it went out. The firemen high fived me.
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
So essentially hes paying me $150k/year for the rest of his career to not have sex
SERIOUSLY? WTF! why cant I find a super hot, super gay, super conservative christian NFL player in need of a beard?
now that you've tased me I refuse to buy you flowers
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
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