I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
What does puking wasabi feel like?
Like snorting cocaine backwards.
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
I took a yellow and pink pill, all of a sudden my sex drive is back, and for some reason all I wanna do is fuck Amish dudes
Good God, I miss doing unknown drugs with you.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
Randomize
