sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
I haven't been laid since Bush was president.
in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
Had a booty call cancel on me tonight. Said he hurt his back. So this is what single and 30-something is like. Suck.
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
I am so not sober enough to have a 5 minute conversation in Spanish
We can only continue to use the "oh what's the difference between circumcised and uncircumcised" for a few more months before people will see through our lies
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
Randomize
