Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
This is my transition from small talk texts to booty call texts. Coming over?
Quite the smooth talker. There in 5.
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
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