I am officially superior to you. I said "Go Go Gadget Dick" before I fucked her. I dare you to beat that.
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
Look dude I'm sorry I used your bong to snorkel in my bathtub last night
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
I just spent 20 minutes in a Subway trying to take a candid photo of the doppleganger of the guy I lost my virginity to instead of eating. That's all the evidence I need that my life is on track.
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
is it fun? or sober?
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
