i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
Just because you put plan b in my Easter basket doesn't give you an excuse not to wear a condom.
Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
she was drinking until 3, woke up at 7, shouted 'I'M STILL DRUNK" and went out for a jog in her thong
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
I might volunteer to give breath samples on the 17th where I would be required to get drunk and then give samples! THE POLICE WOULD PAY ME AND PROVIDE THE ALCOHOL!
Randomize
