Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
i was having this nice romantic moment with my girlfriend. then jimmy came in and peed on the fridge
I drank so much Goldschläger last night, I could shit a necklace.
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
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We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
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Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
I just woke up on my neighbors floor with my boots on, but no pants. I have 3 separate taco bell receipts in my pocket.
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
Oh hello Jordan's parents, I'm here to have sex with your son. He's in the shower? Oh great, I'll join him
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
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