i literally forgot his name and just started calling him "waffles"
I blacked out, fell off a swingset, and thought I was Liz Lemon for almost an hour.
just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Must be January. Theres a fat chick on an elliptical wearing khaki capris. Someone doesnt own any workout clothes
Theres a dude at this concert at the urinal double fisting beers, taking drinks from both while simultaneously pissing euerywhere. He is my hero
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
Do you think it's illegal to work at a bar if you're on probation for a DUI? I need a night job where I can meet men.
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
Halfway through missionary I realized I was partially laying on his sleeping dog and idk that just kinda ruined it for me sooo
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
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