Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
What do you want me to say to her? "Oh hey, I need to borrow your soon to be husband to make a porn, cool?"
We thought we were getting kicked out but then he started tickling the bouncer. Next thing you know the bouncers giving him a piggy back ride to the bar.
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
He kept stopping sex to whisper in my ear, and the only thing I could understand was "double stuffed oreos"
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
So instead of asking me for my number, he asked for my dad's because he wanted to "thank the man that helped create those tits."
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
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