I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
He asked for his proof of insurance and he pulled out a Magnum by mistake. All of the sudden gignger was looking real good to me.
Tiger Woods should have just walked in, gave everyone a high five, and left.
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
She proposed we share a dildo. Hopefully she was joking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
I wanna stuff your vagina full of Reese's peanut butter hearts and eat you clean
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
My life is far to together for someone who's such a hot mess inside
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