Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
I kinda knew it wasnt going to pan out when he would rather watch how i met your mother ON TIVO than fuck me......
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
After that song played in the club all he kept drunkenly saying was "Birdman goes brrrrrr"
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
i feel like if we ever had babies together they would just be drunk all the time
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
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