Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
Why did I wake up with "How to masturbate" on my youtube search bar?
You told us you forgot how, and started to cry.
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
Were you really trying to feed me potato chips while I was sitting on the toilet?
The only people who have said happy valentines day to me today have been 2 homeless people.
I swear to God, if you drunkenly correct my grammar one more time, I'm cutting you off.
I asked her why she named her vibrator Lorenzo and said it was the name she started screaming her first time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
Good news, my sex bruises are fading. Bad news, my boobs look like I have a skin disease because of it.
In retrospect, vomiting out of a moving vehicle on the third date should have been a deal breaker
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being “good” and 10 being “banging a student’s father”, how bad is it that I’m banging a student’s father?
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
Randomize