I have to look really hot tonight because my personality is going to suck.
we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
My face smells like vagina and Im on my way to court. Fuck.
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
Randomize
