I was so high last night. I wrote a poem about my salt shaker
can you call in chlamydia to work? like if the antibiotics they gave you for it are giving you the shits...
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
Ate a live seahorse, then tried to order a nacho bell grande from an ATM.
How the fuck do you get to keep practicing as a Nurse.
I can control the tv with my phone while pooping on the second floor. I thought you should know for future reference
Note to self: trying to grow pubes back = worst decision of 2014 thus far
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
It's official we're now working from home permanently. I'm getting paid to have sex and sandwiches. I hit the lottery.
Randomize
