Ah I wish I was there to nurse you then clean up your piss-filled water bottles
for some reason the bedside piss missed the water bottle today
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
I made a Wendy's employee say fuck this and quit because I started flipping out due to a baked potato shortage. Of course I had a good night
I watched you fall asleep, sitting up, eating a cinnamon roll. You proceeded to wake up...smile at your cinnamon roll, ask it how it got into your hand and then began eating it again. You asked me if you were ridiculous last night, define ridiculous.
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
I finally got out of bed at 8:30pm and my little brother informed me that I had cereal stuck to my back. I'm going to smoke a cigarette and go back to sleep.
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
Randomize