i crunched every chip from the dorito bag and poured it in the vase. never again will i have to deal with cool ranch fingers.
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
I'm gonna let my dick speak for itself from now on. Seriously, it's always recruiting for me even after 6 hours of drinking.
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
i'll talk to you in three hours when you've stopped foaming at the mouth and your eyes have rolled back into place
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
YAS. BRING CRAB.
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
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