I'm at work and it's 1:30. I need a beer. is that bad?
Welcome to every minute of my life.
I told him I was pregnant. Figured it would soften the blow of telling him I had herpes.
Did it?
Not as such, no.
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
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