Why do i always get involved with 3 women at once?
Because life brings drama and thus like moths to a flame, women
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
Remember when I was so high that I thought my appendix burst? All I had to do was fart man, just fart.
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
What's the sex policy on a school bus? Because I dibs back seat.
Sex allowed. Dress code is neon and obnoxious.
We are gonna die. I wanna enforce the "no jumping out of moving vehicles" policy. And how are we gonna get a school bus through mcdonalds drive thru?
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
We're not piercing ourselves today.
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
Randomize
