If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
DUDE, DID YOU KNOW YOU CAN JUST RENT AN ELEPHANT???
Oh God.
the game I always play with drunk me is can-you-button-and-unbutton things? If the answer is no, go home. Usually it's his pants
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
Hey, I told her the bathroom was a "No fly zone" after I used it. She willingly allowed her nose to go through that pain. It's her fault, she only supplied me with vodka when she knows I only drink rum.
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
What are best friends for?
Picking your clothes up from a one night stand you had nearly 2 months ago
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
PANTIES FOUND
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