I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
My biology professor just used the phrase "dick fairy" in a sentence. No, it didn't make more sense in context.
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your dad just texted me? He said I needed to holler at him when I get up tomorrow. I honestly thought you had somehow gone to jail.
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
Bad news man, we're gonna have to reschedule Golden Coral: The Musical
I don't know who the fuck this is, but right on man
From now on he's gonna have to shave first. It feels like I got eaten out by a chainsaw!
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
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