Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
You were right. It hurts to walk today.
I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
is 1am too late, or too early to make bacon?
i woke up at 5 am and found myself wrapped in christmas lights that were plugged into the wall.
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
You threw a bunch of trashcans into the middle of the street and nothing happened. I fell on one car and suddenly there were cops everywhere...
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
Apparently HR frowns upon current employees introducing themselves to the new employee as "Hi I'm sleeping with your cousin"
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
Randomize
