distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
An accidental pregnancy to a guy with a trustfund is no mistake. It is a gift from god.
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
I'm here to help build your repertoire of drunken shenanigans and I should have been arrested stories
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
I've got a 90 day supply of amoxicillin in case of zombie or chlamydia outbreak
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
Best case scenario I do a bunch of dirty things to you, blow your mind and you enjoy it. Worst case I stare at you, poke at you, smile and droll on myself, you laugh.
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
Randomize
