I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
I can't wet the bed. That was the old me. I'm grown
Oh my god
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
I POOPED CONFETTI TOO. Ingested unacceptable amount of it oh my god can I die from this?
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
Randomize
