Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
Just asking. Could've given you a lap dance in a sombrero, drenched in corona and tequila.
God Bless cinco de mayo
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
I'm sorry I came to your house drunk and fed pizza to your dog.
So apparently nutella and chocolate body paint aren't actually the same thing.
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
Randomize
