I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
Stop. You don't mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don't mean that.
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
I just bought a 1/4 oz of pot from a coworker who's old enough to be my grandfather...I'm never leaving Portland.
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
I bet your mom's never met a girl who's thrown up at the presidential inauguration before though.
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
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