I thought the fact that I took home a 42 year old with 3 kids would excuse my tardiness this morning because my boss is also 42 and has 3 kids. Boy was I wrong.
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
I want nothing more to get stoned and go to your little sisters petting zoo party but I need to have priorities
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you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
I'm pretty sure that when my parents bought me those savings bonds they thought it would go towards something useful like tuition. Not your bail.
I told you I'd buy you lunch.
Just got hit on by a middle-aged puerto-rican clown who told me that it would be bad to date someone who offers to buy me coffee and makes something of themselves. I love the NY subway.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
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