I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
I really like you and I'm tired of just hooking up. I want you be my boyfriend.
Uhh, I'm not breaking up with my girlfriend to be with you.
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
I will make out with the first guy who tries to pick me up with a lyric from a rap song. I won't even reply, just be on him like whoa.
we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
Can I just lay in bed and you pour vodka through a funnel in my mouth?
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
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