i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
She threw up on me during morning sex and now Im pretty sure I just saw a woman die at 7-eleven. This is way too much for a Monday morning
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
Found my shoes and purse. They're all strapped together in my neighbor's tree. Need to borrow your ladder. Thanks in advance
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
I had to steal sneakers from my man of the night. I dipped. But then realized I left my purse in his house. So I had to stash the shoes in some bushes and wait for him on the stoop. Then after he watches me leave, I run back and get the shoes cuz I didn't wanna be taking my hour long journey home through London at 3 pm in my six inch wedges and club dress
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
It says something about our relationship that he stole your phone to tell me about his dick at 3am and neither of us realized that wasn't you until just now
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
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