I'd wear matching sweaters with you
How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
Why is it that you only get to have sex when you haven't shaved your legs in six weeks and are wearing period stained granny panties?
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
Yeah I'm at the doctors getting a shotand don't know how to tell them I'm still probably drunk from last night
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
Edible... I FEEL CLOSER TO THE UNIVERSE AND I DEF TRAVELED IN TIME. I THINK I CAN READ MINDS NOW.
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
Randomize
