She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
Listening to Whitney Houston sing the National Anthem while I shit before going out tonight. America.
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i wish i could tell my students that all of their lessons plans were brought to them by captain morgan and diet coke. it's like seasame street, only for high schoolers being taught by a student teacher.
I mean.. listen to "Put It In My Mouth" and you'll get the gist of my voicemail for you.
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
I woke up and there is a small Irish man playing call of duty in my room. Discuss.
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
Randomize