I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
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Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So vagazzling was a success
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
My fire has petered out without you
My Peter has fired out without you
That might be the most romantic thing you’ve said to me, unfortunately.
he asked me why I let you steal the gnome, and you jumped out of the bathroom, yelled "you know why!" and ran outside with said gnome
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
I am so dumb. I made a mistake and let him get away.
Don't worry, there are other penises in the sea.
Thanks, mom.
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