Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
YOU NEED TO STOP BLOWING DUDES ON MY COUCH AT MY PARTIES
YOU NEED TO STOP PROVIDING TEQUILA AT YOUR PARTIES
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
Just peed in the fountain while its snowing. Fell flat on my ass, literally my butt naked ass in a pile of snow. It's safe to say I'm done with drinking on weekdays
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
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