I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
i told him i was allergic to semen. he pulled out an epipen.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is a large scratch and bruise about the size of a pizza bagel next to my vagina. Please text back if you know what happened.
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
Randomize