Sooo... I woke up in the shower this morning. It was on.
I guess the cop knew i was on a walk of shame and felt bad...i got to play with the siren the rest of the way home
dude literally just took me 4 trips to take out the recycling from last night. we need to have parties like this more often
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
Sitting beside a stoned cat on the kitchen floor eating cheesecake with my hands...just a struggle
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