she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past.
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
I left his apartment Bc I lost my id. Wandered 5 miles barefoot. Got lost in downtown la. My phone died so I asked for directions from a man at the gas station.. Turns out he was a bum. He led me back to the apartment AND he found my id.
It's like the whiskey god was watching over you
If this first date goes well and I like him, I won't sleep with him. But if it doesn't go well, I'll sleep with him.
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
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