I thought you should know that you passed out in your trash can last night.
Thanks for throwing up on me.
And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
He just stood there...Helen Keller and I could have had a more interesting conversation
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
I just found puke in my bra..
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
He sent me a snapchat of him singing wrecking ball. Guess what the wrecking ball was. Hint: he literally came.
I guess "Ass Fun Friday" is not a thing no matter how many times I say it or bring it up in conversation...
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
Randomize
