You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
Just found a dugout in my rental car glove box. Suddenly my mood is upbeat.
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The intern claims someone glued plastic eyeballs to his penis last night. He going to show everyone in the conference room at 3pm. There is a $5 cover charge.
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
I feel like I've been hit by a truck, flew up and landed on a fence post that went straight through my vagina. No more vodka and sex for a while.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
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