dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
I know he'd never cheat on me. It'd be like choosing Mexican tap water over Patron.
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
I woke up with a massive hangover and realized I still had an entire bottle of tequila in my car...so yeah, working on tomorrow's hangover.
His last Google search was "will sperm ruin the retina display on Apple products?"
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
So TMI but just realizing I have not masturbated since trump took office. He's sucked the sex drive out of me.
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
Currently using my kid's computer to charge my vibrator. #thisis30ish
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
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