I just saw a hot homeless man
new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.
so... my grandma just told me i should be a stripper
well at least shes not calling you fat anymore
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
Today needs to die. The mail delivery guy watched me throw up in my yard while taking my chihuahua out in Christmas pajamas at noon. Low point in my life.
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
Ran out of deodorant. Febreze on a paper towel? Kicking college's ass.
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
Also I’m on 3%. Just Incase.. I miss you and I love you and you’re my everything and I’m getting drunk.
Randomize
