Drinking non-alcoholic beer is like going down on your cousin.
Sure it tastes the same, but it ain't right.
My girlfriend figured out who you are.
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
Just realized I probably only have one more wedding where I can say I fucked the bride.
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
They already have a joint checking account. She's got his balls in her purse! What's next, a shared Facebook account?
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
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