i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
That girl you went home with last night was dressed in a bright blue sweats at the bar. 205lb Smurffete FTL. Boy were you in epic form.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
Woke up to a huge puddle of water in the living room floor, apparently I made an indoor snowman.
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
I will pee on everything he values.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Here's my first problem: I'm drunk
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
I was drunk in the shower and i decided to shave. Im now bleeding to death
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Randomize