do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
I just told a squirrel he was gonna suffocate because he was eating a plastic bag. and i stared at him till he spit it out. Its official, I love squirrels more than people. they actually listen.
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
The majority of the reason I want to get my pilot's license is so I can use the argument "FUCK YOU! I'M A PILOT!"
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
I gotta do like a month's worth of catch-up personal hygiene today in prep for Christmas so extended family doesn't ask if I'm depressed.
Randomize
