Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
A lumberjack bearing the gift of small oranges or gymnast sex... I love you man but you lose that battle 9 out of 10
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
I didn't even know we were hiding from the cops, I was just playing with the cats. People kept telling me to be quiet the cops are here and I was like DID YOU SEE THIS CAT!?
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