i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
Shooting a bottle rocket from my penis was entirely justified. Twenty bucks is twenty buck no matter how you look at it
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
Learned two new lessons today: 1) Do not identify pills found in one's car by taking them to see what happens, especially while at work, and 2) There is no logical reason to keep ambien in one's vehicle...
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
Randomize
